Some Thoughts On Motion

Well, I guess I should admit it. I’m a doer. Ask my partner and he’ll tell you without hesitation that I like to get stuff done. I must take after my mom who refers to herself as an ‘active listener,’ basically meaning she’ll be moving around ceaselessly as you try to carry on a conversation with her.

Aside from my natural desire for motion, I think that my drive to do has to do with being a full time mama. When your work is full-time parenting, you can tend to become a little too obsessive about getting something done, about accomplishing something tangible. So much of the work of parenting is invisible, the ‘results’ intangible for the most part. Sometimes my desire for a clean kitchen or an organized pantry simply get the better of me and in the process create stress for all of those around.

So lately I’ve come to realize that in my drive to do, I’m missing some of the best stuff. Not that I don’t spend ample time with the kids playing on the floor, going for walks, dancing and singing, but if I’m honest, there are all too many times that I find myself becoming a little too much of an ‘active listener’. I’m hurrying the kids along or stopping the fun too soon for the sole purpose of accomplishing one more task on *my* agenda.

Not only does this lead to a more harried home life replete with a frazzled and sometimes resentful mama (why can’t I ever get my pantry organized?), but even more importantly, the results of this kind of doing are directly the opposite of what I’m hoping to achieve long-term. In essence, the harder I try to get all the little things done, the more the big picture things begin to slide. Because, what I actually want more than a clean kitchen is a peaceful home.

I’m not saying of course that you have to entirely forgo what brings you a sense of accomplishment, nor of course that there aren’t a myriad of household tasks that need to be done each day. What I’m saying though is that both the pace and the quality of the doing has a major impact on the kind of home life we create.

If in the doing of small tasks you are jeopardizing your larger vision; it’s probably time to take a step back and reconsider the necessity of the activity in this moment.